This was a peaceful breakfast we had in Paris a couple of years ago. I join in the movement for choosing to push away fear and bring love and strength to the forefront. My mother and her siblings grew up with parents who endured a war and a third world society. Teaching survival from robbers, abductors etc. was an integral part of their upbringing from parents who had experienced such things. They grew and thrived as a family as Korea came up but still, these lessons were passed on to us. My sister and I were taught to be brave, not fearful. We were strong and kind. We used to roll our eyes when our mom would tell us ways to defend ourselves in case of trouble because we always lived in super hokey-safe neighborhoods. Chris and I want to show Grant that the world is a good place. Sometimes bad things can happen but the world is still good and he can make a difference in it.We are praying for all the people lost in Paris and their families.
What have you been thinking about after the events in Paris?
My mom has been here all week. She cooks us meals, does our laundry and takes Grant to the park many times a day. I feel so spoiled! I had a huge list of things I wanted to get done and then I ended up mostly sleeping. HA! Glorious.
I made this plant hanger for our bedroom from some macrame rope I got at Micheals a few weeks ago. I’ve been making a point to fit in a tiny bit of time each week to work on a fun project. I used to want large blocks of time to dedicate to creativity and now I’m finding ways to fit in little sprints of it.
I’ve even been knitting again (yes, still the same baby baby blanket for Grant) a few minutes every few nights and it’s awesome!
Is there a little fun project that you could fit into a few minutes here and there? It makes me immensely happy!
I’m a walking zombie a lot of the time but I’m a happy one. As I get deeper into motherhood I see how one loses one’s self into it. I was fighting so hard at the beginning to “retain my identity” and now that isn’t so important in the same way. Now I see it as a temporary state, this full emersion as the mother of a baby.
My mother recently told me how she remembered my first full day of school. After dropping me off and returning home she thought, “Oh, I have a full day alone. I”ll listen to music now. Now, I’ll make something to eat. Well, what do I do now?”
I try to remember the things I would see her doing as I grew up. There were crafts, International Wive’s Clubs (charity organizations when we lived overseas), volunteering at my school, sewing costumes for us, making all of our lunches, taking us shopping for school supplies and driving us everywhere.
I never heard her say anything about, “What about me? I need my identity. I need my career.” It wasn’t for lack of ambition or intelligence. She quietly did all the house chores herself, never asked for recognition and laughed often, telling us that no one was going to make us happy, that it was up to ourselves.
I’m going to soak it all up, mothering my little one. These days will be gone someday. I’m still here.
Social media, blogs, photos…They can seem so fake and posed. Well, a lot of the time they are. HA! When I look back at photos of my family, like this one (“posed” but really reading and I washed my hair), I see the beauty of my mind’s eye. In my head, every time I read to Grant, it feels like this warm, cuddly moment. I feel beautiful, everything is clean (maybe some food on his shirt). For me, it makes up for the 9.8/10 days I have a disheveled pony, bags under my eyes, Grant is teething and grouchy. So my obsession with photography and capturing everyone else’s most beautiful moments forever.
How do you recharge? Yesterday, I went to Target…by.my.self. It was glorious. I got an iced coffee and ran into someone I knew (for like 5 seconds) so I’ll add coffee date to that list. I put lots of things in my basket, walked around to areas multiple times and put most of the stuff back on the shelves. I checked my phone for Instagram decorating inspiration and web surfed. Even got a “look” from a salesperson that said, “This lady has been hovering in home decor for waay to long. Just buy that throw already, OK? It’s returnable. Gosh!” Ha!
Phew. It’s easy for me to talk myself outta doing something for myself. I’m going to make a commitment to doing more of this! Any tips?
There I was, eating an entire mini sheet cake, a jar of kimchi and there were weeks where I didn’t even think about coffee. Oh, I must be pregnant again…
Oh…HI!!! I’ve been nesting in our new home and adjusting to moving back to San Diego. I was a totally different person when I lived here last! It has been interesting reacquanting myself with my most favorite place on earth.
When I lived here before I was a busy acupuncturist, social butterfly and adventurer. Now I’m married with a 16 month old and I’m tired. HA!
In the past couple of months we’ve had houseguests, family gatherings, unpacking, San Diego-ing (zoo, hikes, burritos) and baby raising. The biggest source of stress for me has been whether or not to reopen my acupuncture practice. Many very nice patients and fellow colleagues have asked me and encouraged me to do so and I miss it very much.
The mental energy going toward contemplating this decision was actually very consuming. Then when I thought I may be pregnant a few weeks ago (I’m not- BTW) I got super excited about the idea of spending my days savoring mommy hood and preparing for growing the family.
There was my answer.
So, if you’re looking for a magic 8 ball type of answer to your burning questions, take some time to really daydream your most happiest outcome of a situation, no matter how impractical it may seem. Then GO for it! Please tell me what your contemplating!
So, I’m a full-time mom and a part-time photographer. I also hope to get back to regular weekly blog posts and Instagram is my new BFF.